response to "if only"

i still really like the wasy that kady sets up the three points of views. and i think a lot of the problems with the first draft of this story were very well taken care of. like the gun etc. i still have a problem with kendal showing up at sophia's house, though. she takes her in the backyard, which was unclear why in the first story, and in this new draft the reader is told that there is a party. but there was no previous mention of a party and sophia had just gotten out of the shower. we are given no party guest reaction to the gunshot, we dont even see the party. also, im not sure about the way the flashbacks are set up in the story. they seem very jumpy and it is all in a moment. like when kendal comes to the house and all sophia can think of when she is shot is carter. then carter thinking of sophia as she dies in his arms. over all, though, i really like the way this story developed from the first draft. there is a lot more detail and a great story backing to it.